I have a dear friend who is able to "hold sacred space" for me. She listens to my pain in a non-judgmental way without having to "fix me".

She is of great value to the growth of my soul and I hope I am able to hold space for her when she needs it.

Being with someone as a companion just makes more sense to me than any other model of helping. This way of companioning someone is fleshed out in Dr. Alan Wolfelt's book, Companioning the Bereaved: A Soulful Guide for the Caregiver. As Wolfelt states, "I am a companion, not a guide (which assumes knowledge of another's soul I cannot claim)".
To companion our fellow human beings during times of heartache and pain means to witness and learn as opposed to playing the expert. It is about creating and holding space for others to feel what they feel.

Companioning is about honoring the spirit; it is not about focusing on intellect, it is about curiosity, not expertise. Companioning is about learning from others, about walking alongside; not leading or being led. It is about being still and discovering the gifts of sacred silence. It is about listening with the heart and not analyzing with the head. Companioning is about bearing witness to the struggles and being present to another person's pain. It is about respecting disorder and confusion rather than imposing order and logic.

Companioning is about going to the wilderness with another human being and not thinking you are responsible for finding the way out. "

We gather together, we tell the stories and honor the stories as sacred ground. We create space where the stranger can enter and become a friend.

Next Month: Living With Loss: “If Only I Had…”

You can contact Becky Watkins at the following e-mail address: becky.watkins@christushealth.org