Dear Bettye: I never have things turn out the way I want.  Why is life so great for some and not others?  I am a good person but I don’t have the luck some horrible people do.

Expecting life to treat you well because you are a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.  Forget about other people.  I hope all your dreams come true.    

Dear Bettye: I have recently divorced after 42 years of marriage. I dated a very nice man three times who suddenly hasn’t called again.  What could account for his change of heart?

 There was no change of heart because his heart wasn’t in it in the first place.  Forget him and consider yourself lucky.

Dear Bettye:  I am marrying a man who has been married before and all my friends say is wrong for me.  Should their opinion alter my decision?.

If possible, have lunch and a long talk with his two former wives. Then make your decision.

Dear Bettye: The man I am dating, we’re both in our 60s, always talks about how he exercises and all the vegetables he eats.  He says he is macho, but is becoming a bore.  How can I get him to stop talking about his body?

You can’t.  It only proves what I have said for years:  Macho isn’t mucho.

Dear Bettye: My husband left me for an older woman who is not attractive at all.  No one can understand it.  Can you explain such behavior?

It’s difficult for me to answer your question without knowing the extent of her financial portfolio and bank account balances.

Dear Bettye: It’s spring again and soon my neighbor will get mad when I cut low-hanging branches on my side of the fence from a tree that is on his side of the fence.
He says the tree is his and I should not cut any of it off.

 I talked with a brilliant lawyer who said anything that hangs over onto your property is yours – even the air.

Dear Bettye – What is the absolute time limit one has to write thank you notes for gifts received for weddings, birthdays, and so on? 

A thank you for a wedding gift or any other gift should be sent as soon as it is received.  It is my own personal opinion that all thank you notes should be sent – except in cases of amnesia – in one month.

Dear Bettye:  I want no mention of my former husband’s name in my obituary since he has accumulated three other wives since we divorced.  How can that be done?

Write your obituary now and file it with the funeral home you will use.  Tell relatives and friends the obituary has been written and where copies are located.  Except in the cases of movie stars death notices are very brief and don’t include former spouses.

Dear Bettye: My former fiancé broke our engagement after I had made unrefundable deposits on the reception hall, flowers and so on.  He paid half the cost of expenses, but my family and friends say he should be forced to pay the entire amount.  What do you think?

I think you are lucky to be rid of half the debt and completely rid of him.

Dear Bettye:  You make it sound like it’s easy to be polite while trying to work and earn a living.  I am a salesperson and the people I deal with every day are rude and impossible to please.  I could be polite if I didn’t have to work.

I never said it was easy – but it is necessary.  No matter how rude they are, they must be treated with courtesy.  My mother, who was always right, said to me when I commented about someone who was rude that all rude people must be treated as if they were insane.  I have found over the years that it works.  I hope it works for you.

Send your questions or comments to bdekrcoa@AOL.com
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