If you ask me...
Dear Bettye: I hate being called a senior citizen, honey, or young at heart or anything else. Especially in stores where the clerks call me honey in low, sorrowful voices. I don’t want to be considered old just because I have reached my 65th birthday. I agree. Why young at heart? The inference is that an older heart good for nothing but a cholesterol depot. Let managers know you find the clerk’s attitude offensive. Merchants realize who has all the money and the power: you and those with whom you don’t want to be lumped. Dear Bettye: I am 65 and dating a wonderful man who is five years younger than I. I am afraid to get serious about someone younger than I am. I have heard people talk about women who marry a younger man. What do you think? No one says a word when a man who is 65 and marries a woman five years younger. If he is as wonderful as you say, five years should not be a cause for concern. Dear Bettye: I am dating a man who is my age, we are both in our early 60s, and I look through his email without him knowing just to see if he is seeing anyone else. He never talks about former girlfriends so I want to know more about his life before I met him. Am I wrong? I admire him for not discussing other women. I don’t regard him as secretive, but as a gentleman. Distrust is a lethal factor in any relationship and violating his privacy by reading his emails is wrong. Talk to him about your concerns and if that doesn’t ease your mind maybe he is not the man for you – or you the woman for him. Dear Bettye: I am fed up with my sister-in-law. She gives things she doesn’t want to people for birthdays and Christmas. She had loads of money so it’s not because she can’t afford two gifts a year. The answer is so simple. Everyone should give the gifts back to her for birthdays and Christmas. And keep doing it until she understands she is needs to give new gifts. But don’t count on it. Dear Bettye: My cousin and a purple-haired friend covered in tattoos asked us to do a poll for a college course about television shows. At the end he asked if we had any questions and we said no. They began to laugh and said it was a psychological test that had nothing to do with our selection of television shows but was assigned by their professor to record reactions to people who looked different. He said the tattoos were all stick-on.. We were aggravated and said we did not appreciate the deception. Were we rude? No. I would have said he should tell the professor that the whole test is worthless, proves nothing and the premise is invalid. Since it was a relative who brought the person to your house you were prevented by good manners by asking embarrassing questions no matter who crazy he looked. Dear Bettye: I had several dates with a nice man, but we both dated other people. One of the women he began dating was my cousin. She asked me why I did not date him any longer. I said things were getting too serious so I stopped seeing him. So she stopped seeing him. Now I am furious with myself, him and her. How can I fix things? You can’t. Besides, she would continue to see him if she really wanted to. But if you want to feel better, tell her he is a wonderful man and when you said getting serious you meant you were getting too serious and you just don’t want to get married at this time. Some people will believe anything. Dear Bettye: I am worried about my nephew. His clothes barely hang on his body and the pants drag on the ground and while they are clean the bottoms are frequently covered with dirt. I am worried that he could bring germs into the house. How can I tell him that? It is your house and you don’t have to explain anything. Tell him he must roll up the bottoms of his pants so the dirt won’t get on your rugs and he will have to pull up his pants so they won’t fall off and embarrass everyone. He can make his fashion statement elsewhere. .Dear Bettye: I am dating a widower and he says he doubts he will ever marry again. Should I keep on seeing him or do you think I am wasting my time? If you aren’t interested in marrying again either, date him as long as you want to. If, on the other hand, you are interested in marrying again, date someone else. Dear Bettye: I am known as a fun person because I poke fun at other people. It sounds bad but most people don’t get mad about it. Is this wrong? You bet it is. You’d be surprised to learn exactly what you are known as. No one likes to be the butt of a joke however funny you may think it is. Even those who laugh resent you for it. Send your questions or comments to bdekrcoa@AOL.com
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