IHave you ever seen so many people sneezing, snorting, coughing and simply miserable in general?  Almost everyone has an allergic reaction to the pollen which seems to be in an even greater abundance than usual.  Others may be experiencing the common cold that is unfortunately all too accurate a term.

I am not an unkind person, and can on occasion be somewhat understanding, but I draw the line at being forced to share a stranger’s misery with whatever symptoms they are experiencing. 

There are certain rules to observe when one has any sort of affliction involving sneezing and coughing. The rules are:

One:  Thou shall not sneeze or cough within 50 feet of others.

Two: Thou shall not touch or breathe on others.

Three: Thou shall not leave thy pile of used tissues anywhere.

Four:  Thou shall not elaborate on thy condition for a prolonged period of time.

Five:  Thou shall accept thy untouchable status with grace.

Six: Thou shall not wheeze, snort or sniffle.

Seven: Thou shall not grunt, groan or grizzle.

Eight: Thou shall not stand face-to-face with others no matter what the situation.

Nine: Thou shall not touch the possessions of others.

Ten:  Thou shall describe the catastrophic effect the ailment has visited on thy   general health.

No one wants to know all places that have been attacked by the cold, or to be made to recognize that the agonizing stuffed nose is life-threatening. All I am keenly interested in is this:  Will the person have the cold at home in the privacy of their bedroom as a civilized person should do, or transport it to the office, on public elevators, to parties, the movies or where large numbers of potential victims gather?

Superior people will try to contain, confine and control a cold or allergy.  I don’t care what anyone says, it may be difficult, but with single-minded attention to rigid sanitary codes and protocols, it can be done.  But if one, of necessity, share space with others, the choice one makes between isolating oneself by placing a plastic sheet over their head or selfishly breathing into public air space and thereby spreading germs everywhere – reveals the basic character of some people.

Sympathy is given only to those who obey the rule on how to take a cold into a crowded room.  One must perform the proper signal to alert everyone that someone is present with a cold.  It is absolutely required that a white  - absolutely spotless – handkerchief be held over the nose and mouth.  Rather like a flag of truce.

My mother, who was always right, said, “A cold, as someone’s private business, should be kept to oneself.”