Dear Bettye: I am trying to end a friendship with a man who won’t take a polite hint that I am not romantically interested in him. He keeps calling.  What can I do?

The next time he calls say, “I am seeing someone so I can’t take any more calls from you.”  It is the truth because you see people all the time.

Dear Bettye: My friend says “Old-hammer” for Alzheimer.  How can I let her know people are laughing about it?

Just keep pronouncing the word correctly and hope she notices.  I am assuming you pronounce it correctly.

 Dear Bettye: The man I date is the same height I am but I weigh more than he does.  He always wants to dance and is very good.  I am embarrassed to always the center of attention on the dance floor. Help!

He knows what you weigh and if he wants to dance with you – then dance.

Dear Bettye: I was surprised recently to read that income of $50,000-$100,000 is middle class.  What’s high class?

Class is a word used by the government to denote income, not social standing.  Money doesn’t and never did equate with culture.  One’s class is not determined by the amount of money one has.

 Dear Bettye: How do you take the car keys away from an elderly person who is no longer a careful driver but is very independent and insists on continuing to drive?

Have a trained professional at the Motor Vehicle Department give them a test drive to determine if they should continue to drive.

Dear Bettye:  A coworker is always borrowing small amounts of money and never pays it back. It is approaching $100 that she owes me and I really need the money.

My mother, who was always right, said “If you loan money to a friend, you will collect it from an enemy.”  My grandfather told me many years ago to never lend money – only give it if you can afford it.  If you are not paid back there are no hard feelings and if you are, you can be pleasantly surprised.

Dear Bettye:  I bought a beautiful, but very expensive  dress to wear to a New Year’s party and wore it only once and decided it was the wrong color.  I returned it to the store and my brother told me I was wrong.  The dress was in perfect condition.  Is it wrong?

Yes. It is your responsibility to be very, very certain that the dress is a perfect fit and the color is divine before you buy something whether it is expensive or not. Anything worn once is considered used. 

Dear Bettye:  I work as a financial adviser and one of my clients has asked me to start putting some money away in another account so that his wife can’t get her hands on it.
I feel uncomfortable about this.  What do you say?

It is perfectly legal for a married person to set up a separate bank account.  There can be many legitimate accounting, tax or personal reasons to do so. If you can’t be certain what his motives are and since you feel something is not exactly right, then I would not continue to have this man for a client.

Dear Bettye: We always give several cocktail parties during the holiday season, but I am fed up with people who don’t bother to say hello or goodbye.  I find glasses and plates of uneaten food under chairs and couches.  Worse yet, some porcelain boxes are missing after one party last year.  What am I doing wrong?

Inviting the wrong people.  It appears to me you would be better off to have smaller partiers so you could enjoy them.  You would also have an opportunity to find out who your porcelain boxes are going home with.

Dear Bettye: One of my friends calls me three or four times a day.  I spend a lot of my time talking to her about nothing.  What can I do?

When you answer the telephone and it is her say you are just leaving, but will call her later in the day. Then leave the room so you will have told the truth.  When you have time to talk then return her call.

Dear Bettye: We hosted a family reunion for Thanksgiving and without telling me my cousin brought her boyfriend.  When we gathered to take a picture I asked the boyfriend to stand out of the picture and my cousin got mad and left.  Several other relatives said I was rude.  What would you have done?

I would have asked the boyfriend to take the picture.  But back to your cousin.  No one should bring an uninvited guest to anything without asking permission.

Dear Bettye:  We have been friends for years with another couple.  The husband for the last few months has been patting my back and making suggestive remarks to me when his wife and my husband can’t hear him.  How can I tell him to stop without causing trouble?

It is ridiculously simple. Say, “Never do that or say that me again.”  You should have said that the first time it happened.  I can/t imagine why you didn’t.  Or maybe I can.

Dear Bettye:  Do you ever get questions you can’t answer?

No.  But I get many I can’t print.

Dear Bettye:  Could I wear a long dress for an afternoon wedding?

Of course, and my very best wishes to you.  I know you are the bride because a wedding guest would not dream of wearing a long dress in the afternoon.

Send your questions or comments to bdekrcoa@AOL.com
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